Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Tyyyrrraaaaaa Maaaaiiillll!!!!!!!!!!!

IT'S ALL IN THE EYES

It was an interesting ANTM last night for the reason that two girls were eliminated. First, Miss J. informs them of their next challenge, which is to catwalk down a bowling alley in bowling high heels. Hannah's walk was extremely stiff. which causes Miss Jay to say, "She walks almost like a crazy." He then does a hilarious imitation of her stiff strut


The second part of the challenge involves the girls walking for bitchy designer, Jeremy Scott. . . blindfolded. Jay Manuel shows up and makes it clear that Tyra's not fucking around. One of them would be eliminated immediately based on their shitty walk.

As Samantha practices her walk by flitting her dress around her hips, Jeremy Scott warns her not to walk like that. So what does she do? On the runway, she practically flips the dress over her head. Uh oh. Mr. Jeremy Scott is NOT pleased. He likens her walk to a combination of a truck driver and a stripper. But it's Hannah that's booted off for her nervous, stiff walk. I wasn't that sad to see her go. There is something rather irritating about her that's been emerging as the weeks go by.


Joslyn wins the challenge, which means she gets to choose two other models (she chooses Isis and Sheenah) to go on an editorial shoot for Seventeen Magazine to model for Kira Plastistina, a fifteen-year-old designer from Russia.

After the immediate booting of Hannah, the girls are freaking out back at the house. Oh my gawd, they're all so vulnerable! Annaleigh is damning herself before the next fashion shoot, despite getting a good review on the runway.

The next morning, the girls are woken by silver-haired Jay Manuel, wearing a "Mr. J" tee, sporty too-short shorts, and a whistle around his neck. He sits up in a life guard chair by the pool in the yard of their house and says they're going to be shot in the pool from the nose up so they have to be expressive with their eyes.


Then, . . . wait for it. . . Nigel Barker emerges up from out of the water with his camera. Aghhhhh! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



The girls all get wild eye makeup and are told to get down in the water. Joselyn fails to tell anyone that she doesn't know how to swim; Clark flirts with Nigel, saying that she's thinking of lying on a bed; Isis is nervous about wearing a bikini bottom and loses her fire in the water; Marjorie does some wild sea serpent poses; and Elina loses her mojo and gets "stuck."


In judging, Isis and Samantha are in the bottom two: Isis for her bad photo and Samantha for her disastrous runway walk. Despite being torn a new asshole by Jeremy Scott AGAIN (he's one of the judges on panel this week), it's Isis that's sent home for becoming invisible and losing it in the eyes.


The winner of this week's challenge is Clark. Runner-up is self-doubting Annaleigh.


Next week? Marjorie's insecurity drives everyone to distraction! Woo hoo!

The Hills Recap

WHEN LAUREN IS AWAY, THE BIOTCHES WILL PLAY

Last night on The Hills, Lauren is off to Italy for vacation. As she's packing, My Sweet Audrina tells her to pack some heels. Lauren says no, they don't wear heels in Italy - only flats. Is this true??!!


After Lauren leaves, Stephanie comes over to the house to ask Audrina's advice because Lauren's former flame, Doug, has asked her out. Obviously Audrina tells her to talk to Lauren about it. But Stephanie seems ready to jump on the opportunity and on Doug, saying, "Yeah, but how will she find out?"



Lo and Audrina decide to spend some bonding time together and hit a club where Spencer and Heidi happen to be. Heidi decides to go say hi to Audrina and the two start yapping away like there was never an awkward Lauren-riff between them.

Meanwhile, Lo is looking lonely watching them chat it up. During their chat, Audrina mentions to Heidi that Doug asked Stephanie out. Heidi is very upset, acting like she cares about Lauren. Hmmm?
She then asks Audrina out for an event she's working the next night.


Next evening, Audrina and Justin Bobby show up at the event and grab a table with Heidi and Spencer. This is when Heidi and Audrina bond and decide to let the past be the past and start hanging out again.

Meanwhile, on their date, Doug and Stephanie run into Brody's mother. Whoops! Cat out of the bag.


When Lauren gets back to LA, Lo and Audrina ask what the guys in Italy were like. She likens Italy to a large construction site with the guys cat-calling every two seconds. She then asks Lo and Audrina what she missed while away. They gave her all the sauce on Stephanie, and Audrina fessed up to hanging with Heidi (SHOCKING!).


What will happen next? Stephani and Doug together on the sly! Stephanie begs forgiveness! Heidi's mother shows up and confronts Heidi about Spencer and how he's ruined her relationship with the rest of the family! Stay tuned to watch what the assholes in the hills will do next. . .

Monday, September 22, 2008

Emmy Awards Fashion Wrap-Up

EMMY AWARDS RED CARPET LOOKS

The Emmys were on last night. I didn't see any major fashion disasters, but then again, I was only half watching. I did see a lot of fabulous-looking dresses, however. Here are my picks for "WOW!"

Sandra Oh

Heidi Klum

Lisa Edelstein

Marcia Cross

Christina Applegate

Brooke Shields

Only one look made me go "huh??"


I don't know what's going on here with Eva Longoria.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

That's Zoe Stylish

I DIE / THAT'S BANANAS

Welcome to my new favorite fashion reality show (besides PR, ANTM, and The Hills, etc): The Rachel Zoe Project. It's like taking the part of The Hills that I love so much, which covers the fashion aspect, and upping the ante.


The show follows celebrity stylist, Rachel Zoe and her bitchy assistant Taylor, her new lovable assistant Brad, her husband Rodger (who happens to look just like Todd Oldham), and the celebrities she dresses.


In the first episode, Rachel has to dress actress Joy Bryant for an event in Hollywood. While looking for something for her to wear, she hits one of her favorite shops, Decades. She tells the camera: "When it comes to Decades, it's literally impossible for me to leave without buying something for myself. It's the mecca of designer vintage." She goes on to gush over the inventory of Decades.


She doesn't end up buy anything for Joy, but finds a bag, necklace, and gown she can't live without. "It just makes me so happy every time I walk through the doors." One of my really bad habits is shopping. . . Part of my working as hard as I do is supporting my habits."


Rachel has two phrases she uses when she finds something that's so gorgeous she doesn't know how to express herself any other way: "I DIE" and "THAT'S BANANAS." In epidsode two of the show, she says about a pair of gorgeous diamond earrings: "This makes me die. I could just like cry. Just throw me in my coffin now with those earrings on. "


Before she can get Joy dressed, she has to deal with her employees. Uber-bitch Taylor is nasty to new fresh-from-Vogue- Brad and won't train him on how they do things the Zoe way until it's too late. Brad talks to Rachel about it and Rachel talks to Taylor. Blah, blah, blah. They start to get along. Sort of.


Meanwhile, Rachel is starting her own brand of accessories and flies to NYC to get the party started. While there, she meets with MIchael Kors and goes through his inventory to find a dress for Joy. IN the end, she finds a red Zach Posen gown and when Joy puts it on, Rachel is compelled to say, "Holy Shit. That's bananas. Joy, you're shutting it down."


In episode two, Rachel has to dress Debrah Messing for the SAGs. Too bad there's a big rainstorm in LA and a leak in Rachel's showroom that soaks all of the dresses, partriculary those she had picked out for Deborah. Brad almost ruins everything but in the end saves the day. YAY Brad!


High fashion drama, different episode, loads of fun. That's bananas!


Friday, September 19, 2008

Make It Work

CUT THAT HAIR AND GET A JOB

This week on PR, Heidi came out with her usual mini-dress and "Hello", then told the designers that their next challenge revolved around the "special ladies" they were about to meet. The designers were presented with a group of middle aged women, which made Leanne ill.

Turns out they weren't designing for these women, THANK GAWD!!!, but for their 20-something daughters who had just graduated from college and were about to emerge as professionals into the work place. They needed a new look for work and the designers were not only responsible for giving them a new outfit, but for their hair as well.


Leanne was visibly relieved that they were designing for the daughters.
She said, "None of us want to design an old lady outfit, to be honest." Kind of fitting that she got the mother from Hell, who was hoping that Leanne would make something for her daughter, Holly, with animal prints.

Kenley got Anna, an assistant buyer for women's accessories. In her, Kenley found a "Mini Me" and went to work making a vintage dress for her. Big surprise there. Kenley was particularly annoying in this episode saying she wasn't going to take Tim's advice to cut the tule hanging below the hemline because she "never really change(s) anything for Tim."

Kenley and her Mimi Me.

Koto decided she was now the "Queen of Lethah" now that Stella's gone. Her client, Megan, is a 21-year-old student who works in her school's lab so Koto designs her a very Kotoesque wrap dress. It was interesting to see photos of her cute little girl who she's designed a couple outfits for.


Jarrell got a print maker named Catlyn who wanted an androgynous look which he enterpreted into a high-waist skirt, blousy top and jacket in brown.

Suede wound up with the Russian mother/daughter team. The daughter, Avital, was a photographer and wanted pants for obvious reasons. But Suede took it upon himself to make her a dress because Suede wasn't comfortable with the pants route. Unfortunately, he bought a very 90s print (very Pucciesque print in purple according to Suede) for the dress and overdid the jacket that went with purple details and ornate draping.


Joe got Laura, a graphic designer, and desicded he wanted to make her look like she was 65 years old by choosing pinstripes and suit material. Unfortunatley Suede ended up in the bottom two with Joe, but Joe was sent packing (phew!) for his aging, cliche-idea-of-a-business-suit business suit. It was pretty bad. So was Suede's, but Jenn hearts Suede and so glad he's still in the mix. So wakidoodle!


Jarrell won the challenge with his gorgeous interpretiation of an into-the-workplace otufit for his client, Catlyn. I wouldn't be surprised at all if he took the whole thing in the end. Go Jarrell!


Oh yeah, and Cynthia Rowley was the guest judge this week.


Next week: Tim rips Kenley a new one!!
Fuck you, Tim. I love me!!

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Tyyyrrraaaaaa Maaaaiiillll!!!!!!!!!!!

MAKEOVER MADNESS !

It was makeover time on ANTM last night. And it really was madness. The girls walked into their house to find Tyra in their living room wearing a tiara and holding a wand. She asked the girls to start eating pizza that had been ordered and then told them the tale of how she and her mom re-structured her career as a Victoria Secret model because she had too much booty and boobie to be a high-fashion model.

Tyyyyraaaa Maaaiiillll!

Just as Tyra was about to tell Analeigh what her makeover would be, Ms. J. walked in dressed as an hunchback old woman with a cane. He handed Tyra an apple and said, "This apple will make you a Top Model forever" then walked away cackling. Tyra took a maniacal bite of the apple and fell into a deep princess coma.

Nothing Jay Manuel dressed in a Prince Charming outfit couldn't cure. Actually, he went by the name "Prince Couture" and he planted one on Tyra that made all the girls go "awwwww" and me go "what what??" It was a little-long winded, I thought. Exactly why this episode was so incredibly entertaining.
The girls didn't get to see what they were going to have done until they wound up at the salon the next day. Some of the more interesting makeovers included:

  • Marjorie, who had her hair dyed brown, which warmed her face up and made her look more like Amalie than before.
  • Elina, who worried about getting someting out of her comfort zone. That's exactly what she got when they wove a very Karen-Elson-like red curly weave into her head. The wow factor was so great I had to rewind to see her after the transformation. She was upset by the transformation and said she didn't recognize herself.
  • Samantha, who Tyra said looked like "any girl walking in a mall with plastic earrings on." They cut her hair off and give her the best haircut I've seen on Top Model in a long time. It's actually the haircut I wanted before I played it safe and only had a couple inches chopped off.
  • Clark, who went dark, chocolate brown. She said she had brown hair now but she's still blonde on the indside.
  • McKey, who had her red hair chopped off and dyed dark brown.
Later, the girls have a challenge at Walmart where they have 30 seconds to pitch Cover Girl TruBlend shade selector for makeup artist, Sutan and Crissy Barker, who also happens to be Nigel Barker's wife. The winner gets to be on the CoverGirl website and a Walmart gift certificate for $1000.

The best moment of the challenge was when Marjorie said, "Thank god for Walgreens." The winnder of the challenge was Hannah who got excited because now she can "Google" herself. Not like she couldn't google herself for being on ANTM?


They had a swimsuit shoot at a big spread in Malibu. The photographer is Russell James and the client is swimsuit designer, Susan Holmes. The two directed the photo shoot and had their "training wheels" removed, according to Jay Manuel. Hannah was asked to control her "psycho eyes" and Brittany was worried that she was too "pretty." In addition, Isis was nervous about moving, most likely due to the difference between her and the other girls and ended up seeming stiff. At judging, Elina "won" the photoshoot and Brittany was sent packing for being too vacant and "pretty." Go figure.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

The Hills Recap

COULD HOLLY BE THE OLIVE BRANCH?

On The Hills, Heidi's sister Holly tells Heidi and Spencer she wants to start hanging out again with Lauren again. Apparently the two used to be very close. Heidi kind of rolls her eyes and says something along the lines of "I can't like tell you who to hang out with" but Spencer thinks he can control Holly's social life. He procedes to yell like a pissed-off father: "When you're living under this roof, there's no Lauren, fraternizing, socializing. . ."

I can't even come up with a comment about that.



Holly and Lauren have lunch during which Holly says, "I don't want the whole Heidi and Spencer thing to affect our friendship." To which Lauren says, "I had just gone through all this stuff with Stephanie and honestly it's been really difficult for both of us. It's obviously not cool to break up like friends but family? That's family. That's your blood. You don't mess with that. I don't ever want to put anyone in that position again."
Despite her misgivings, Lauren obviously misses Holly and wants to hang out with her, telling her to call anytime. She also alludes to missing Heidi.
Oh Lauren, you ARE the sister stealer! (please note sarcasm).



Meanwhile, My Sweet Audrina is asked by one of the head publicists at Epic to head up a party for the band, The White Tie Affair. She asks Justin Bobby to come along. He agrees, saying that anything that will benefit Audrina is something he's going to get behind. This is why he doesn't show up, proving he is the raging dickhead we all thought he was.


At home, Lauren and Audrina are doing well and Lauren, Lo, and Stephanie come to The White Tie Affair affair. At the after-party, Stephanie talks with one of the band members who is inked and pierced all over. She acts coy and says, "Oh my god! What was wrong with you growing up?" She then whispers in his ear that she secretly had her tongue peirced once.


Later on in the show, she shows up to fashion class with Lauren decked out in heavy black eyeliner, tons of earrings, and her hair in twin braids. Wonder what happened between her and that guy after the after-party? If nothing else, he had an influence on her style sense.

At the end of the show, Lauren talks to Stephanie about how she misses Heidi. Meanwhile, Heidi talks to her co-worker about how much she misses Lauren. Could Holly incite an olive branch offering? As Heidi so intelligently put it at the end of the show, "Who knows, maybe Holly will peace everything out."

Monday, September 15, 2008

Hot Guy Alert

A LONG TALL GLASS OF COOL WATER

Cool Water by Davidoff has a new(ish) spoke model - Josh Holloway, also known as Sawyer on Lost. The commercial is downright drool-worthy. If you're a Lost fan and caught the season finale of the show, you'll remember the moment in the episode when Sawyer washes up on the beach, shirtless and dripping wet. Much like the Cool Water commercial. Watch it here.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Make It Work

WHAT'S YOUR SIGN?

This week's
PR was all about the zodiac. The designers were surprised with "guests" that happened to be all their former auffed competitors, which they were to be paired up with. Together they were to create an avante gard look based on the zodiac.

To chose the teams, Tim went in order of the surviving designers' astrological signs and then he chose an auffed designer's name out of a bag to pair them up with. They then had to chose one of their zodiac signs to go with. The resulting teams looked like this:


Koto and Kelly - Aquarius

Kenley and Wesley - Aquarius

Joe and Daniel - Aries
Leanne and Emily - Scorpio

Blayne and Stella - Libra
Terri and Keith - Leo

Jarell and Jennifer - Sagitarius
Suede and Jerry - Libra


Terri was completely put out by having to work with Keith and pretty much ignored everything he suggested. Blayen and Stella were in "love your face / I'll hammar your face" heaven together. Kenley was a complete pain in the ass, bossing Wesley all over Mood, even saying that he "takes direction well."


After visiting getting their fabrics, the real work began.During the construction, Leanne and Emily started talking about Kenley's overconfidence, which I understand, but it just made them look like jealous betties. As Tim came around to give his 2 cents, he worried about Jarrell's choice of fabric for the skirt of his outfit. "It's like you took a school marm's old winter coat and tried to make it into a couture dress."

When Tim approached Kenley and Wesley about the ugly-ass mess she was making and said it looked like "Glenda the Good Witch of the North" she got incredibly defensive and said, "She would never be this fabulous!" To which, Tim said, "Don't listen to me" in a really peeved tone. Tim had every reason to be concerned as Kenley's dress looked like two completely different dresses in one, with two entirely different print for the skirt and the top.


Tim then told Terri to listen to Keith because he's innovative and it became clear they just weren't meshing. Tim just looked at them like "you're fucked" and said, "You have to make it work."

The next day the designers were srurpised in the workroom with a note from Heidi that stated they were to show their desgins at a party at the American Space Museum of Natural History that evening and that TWO of the designers would be auffed.


At the party, the designers were in for even more surprises when they were met with past winners and contenders of Project Runway, including Daniel, Carmen, Christian, Jay, etc. . The past designers were there to critique the outfits and give the current designers some pointers. They were also there to cast ballots of who they thought should win the challenge.


When Heidi looked at Kenley's mess of a dress, she asked "Why are the boobs down here?" Kenley huffed and puffed and said, "Look where yours are and where mine are."Kenley told the camera, "If Heidi is talking nonsense, I'm going to step in and set her straight." Uh huh.


She found herself in the bottom four alongside Blayne (who was the second designer in 2 seasons of PR to be described as having a model pooping fabric), Suede, and Terri. Blayne was sent packing. I was sad for him and for me since I started to really warm up to him. I also loved him and Stella as a team, despite the weird getup they made.


Terri deserved her boot in the butt for not listening to anyone. Michael Kors said it best when he said her dress looked like, "Voodoo Princess in Hell." Suede was allowed to stay (yay!) despite his boring, safe design. Kenley was also allowed to stay, which surprised me because she's been so outright bitchy and stubborn. And she made such an atrocity.


The winner of the this challenge? Jarrell. His Leo look took the prize. Very nice outfit, but I thought Joe's should have been the winner. .His and Daniel's interpretation of Aries was stunning.


Next week? Sexy teacher dresses